Over at WorldNetDaily, there’s a new editorial by Chuck Norris on who the founding fathers would support as the next President of the United States. Norris is uniquely qualified to comment on American history because he played Walker, Texas Ranger on television.

He determines, based on a sermon from the year 1790 which contains what Norris calls “a general consensus and credo of what citizens (not just clergy) expected of their legislative leaders”, that the first qualification for job should be:

Select and prefer Christians

I agree. I did not create all men equal. When I sent my nephew Jesus down to Earth to badger some of the Israelites into feeling guilty, I was sending a message: “Ye are better than everyone else.” Modern luminaries like Ann Coulter and Chuck Norris are keeping My message alive.

Norris continues:

governmental leaders are to be regarded as ministers or servants of God

Everybody should be a servant of Me. Sure, as an all-powerful deity I could do everything for Myself, but it’s much more fun to make you do it. I could have struck down a hundred thousand Iraqis with lightning if I wanted to, but it sure was entertaining to outsource the job to My loyal smite-monkey George.

… Christianity was the only religion upon which our Republic was founded. It was clergy, not imams, who were called to speak before legislatures. Even Jefferson did not propose a separation between mosque and state, just as he could never have imagined a democracy in which its congressmen were sworn into government upon a Quran.

It’s about time somebody figured out that separation of church and state was My way of saying, “no mosques!” If you let a politician swear his oath of office with his hand on the Quran instead of the Bible, that opens up the possibility that the politician might someday lie.

Norris also points out that, according to the authoritative sermon, the first chief obligation of a governmental leader is

…to uphold the kingdom of Christ, which consists in “righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.”

Even I don’t know how to justify that one, but props to Chuck for saying that and this:

The spirit of those proceedings, as well as the remaining Founding Fathers, still beckon us to raise our criteria for electing governmental leaders beyond charisma, articulation, education, and background experience. They call us to appoint godly men and women.

I hope America continues its recent trend of appointing its presidents from among My most devoted followers, men who are neither charismatic, articulate, educated, nor experienced. It’s no surprise that this idea angers some American atheists, who insist that I don’t exist despite the fact that I obviously have a blog.

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